Come get a grin as God and Satan duke it out over who helps or hurts humanity.From Denny: Life is funny. Life is amusing. What's true is even more amusing. While visiting a fellow blogger's site -
Aphorism of the Day -
nothingprofound had this
quote:
“God had no purpose in creating the world. He was just having fun.”
Of course, there were some funny comments in answer. The funniest I enjoyed was from another fellow blogger, an artist,
Christina @
Christinas Daily Paintings. She left this long hilarious God and Satan rivalry joke. I know I'm "tempted" to add a few lines. Why not add some of your own lines in the comment section? This is one of those jokes that could be long-running, so long-running it runs down the road for generations! :)
(My Title)
It's All In The Creation "In the beginning God created the heavens and the Earth. And the Earth was without form, and void, and darkness was upon the face of the deep.
And Satan said, "It doesn't get any better than this."
And God said, "Let there be light," and there was light.
And God said, "Let the earth bring forth grass, the herb yielding seed, and the fruit tree yielding fruit," and God saw that it was good.
And Satan said, "There goes the neighborhood."
And God said, "Let us make Man in our image, after our likeness, and let them have dominion over the fish of the sea, and over the fowl of the air and over the cattle, and over all the Earth, and over every creeping
thing that creepeth upon the Earth." And so God created Man in his own image; male and female created he them. And God looked upon Man and Woman and saw that they were lean and fit.
And Satan said, "I know how I can get back in this game."
And God populated the earth with broccoli and cauliflower and spinach, green and yellow vegetables of all kinds, so Man and Woman would live long and healthy lives.
And Satan created McDonald's. And McDonald's brought forth the 99-cent double cheeseburger.
And Satan said to Man, "You want fries with that?"
And Man said, "Supersize them." And Man gained 5 pounds.
And God created the healthful yoghurt, that woman might keep her figure that man found so fair.
And Satan brought forth chocolate. And Woman gained 5 pounds.
And God said, "Try my crispy fresh salad."
And Satan brought forth Ben and Jerry's. And Woman gained 10 pounds.
And God said, "I have sent thee heart-healthy vegetables and olive oil with which to cook them."
And Satan brought forth chicken-fried steak so big it needed its own platter.
And Man gained 10 pounds and his bad cholesterol went through the roof.
And God brought forth running shoes and Man resolved to lose those extra pounds.
And Satan brought forth cable TV with remote control so Man would not have to toil to change channels between ESPN and ESPN2.
And Man gained another 20 pounds.
And God said, "You're running up the score, Devil." And God brought forth the potato, a vegetable naturally low in fat and brimming with nutrition.
And Satan peeled off the healthful skin and sliced the starchy center into chips and deep-fat fried them. And he created sour cream dip also.
And Man clutched his remote control and ate the potato chips swaddled in cholesterol. And Satan saw and said, "It is good."
And Man went into cardiac arrest.
And God sighed and created quadruple bypass surgery.
And Satan created HMO's."
And Denny adds: And so, to answer the health dilemma, God created the cookies formerly known as gingersnaps, made with healthful molasses and low in calories to help Man and Woman stay fit.
And so Satan, not to be outdone by the Creator, proved he is ready to take over the Universe: He said, "I'll make cookies too irresistible so they will have to be dunked in milk to keep them addicted - while I load them up on calories." And so Satan invented Oreos, reflecting his devilish sense of humor of the outside dark closing in on the inside center of light.
And God said, "Not to worry. People take apart the cookies to enjoy the light in the center. Besides, I just invented Double Stuffed Oreos, all the more sweet goodness to enjoy." And so God upped the anty. Satan never was any good at poker.
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