Old and Wise

To be old and wise, you first must be young and stupid.

Teacher: You failed your exam.

Kid: You too failed to teach me.

I don't hate you, it's just, if you were on fire... I would roast marshmallows.

Elders say: Alcohol is your enemy.

Jesus says: Love your enemy.

Case closed.

I didn't fall, I was testing gravity.. It still works.

My Birthday

It's my birthday! How about a birthday kiss and hug?

People love me only on one day, that is the day you know I took birth.

Did anyone see my lost carrier?

He was proposing me since very long time. So I gave him chance to serve me.

What is the benefit of being together when parents decide about their marriage.

You're so sweet and nice. Can I know your taste.

Zuni: Looks like I'm going to have to shove these love beads some place special.
Joe: Nice hat. I had a hat like that once, then my mom got a job.

Dad read a book about prehistoric lice that was about two feet long. He head itches from the treatments and he now thinks he has lice and wants us to check his hair!

A man complaining to his best friend: 'You know, I had all - money, a good house, luxury car, the love of a beautiful girls...then ... pow! ... it was all gone!''What happened?' asked the friend.'Ahhhh ... Police found my wife...'

Friends may come and go, but enemies tend to accumulate.

You missed school yesterday didn't you? Hmm.. Not very much!

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Read all good stuff related to that special day at Birthday Quotes.

Admin

"you are really so adorable to me, I don't want to miss any opportunity to have celebration with you. and today - it's your birthday. the great day to give you lots of love and blessings. we really gonna rock this day. happy birthday, dear"

Anonymous

'Lots of people have written wonderful sayings about birthday but they have not mentioned their name. So here are those anonymous quotes related to the day of birth.'

"Wow, It's your birthday. It is as special for me as it is for you because I have the honor of spending it with you"

"I got up in the morning, checked my calender. Oh great it is very special day for me. It is my soul-mate's birthday.

"Would ye both eat your cake and have your cake?"

"My mom won't let me buy high-fashion stuff unless it's TK Maxx or a birthday occasion."

j. p. sears

"let us respect gray hairs, especially our own"

jonathan swift

"may you live all the days of your life"

Joanna Huchs

"I’m wishing you another year
of laughter, joy and fun,
surprises, love and happiness,
and when your birthday’s done,

I hope you feel deep in your heart,
as your birthdays come and go,
how very much you mean to me,
more than you can know"

sophie tucker

"from birth to age eighteen, a girl needs good parents. from eighteen to thirty-five, she needs good looks. from thirty-five to fifty-five, she needs a good personality. from fifty-five on, she needs good cash"

frank sinatra

"may you live to be 100 and may the last voice you hear be mine"

anonymous

"born on Monday, Fair in face; Born on Tuesday, Full of God's grace; Born on Wednesday, Sour and sad; Born on Thursday, Merry and glad; Born on Friday, Worthily given; Born on Saturday, Work hard for your living; Born on Sunday, You will never know want"

oscar wilde

"one should never trust a woman who tells her real age. A woman who would tell one that would tell anything"

anonymous

"birthdays are nature's way of telling us to eat more cake"

robert frost

"a diplomat is a man who always remembers a woman's birthday but never remembers her age"

chili davis

"growing old is mandatory; growing up is optional"

anonymous