I heard you are a player. Nice to meet you. I am the Coach.
Everyday I make promise I'll go to bed early. Every night I break.
When I wake up in the morning and stretch, I make baby dinosaur noises.
That one friends you have that always says "I'm never drinking again" after party.
What doesn't kill you makes you smaller.
That awkward moment when someone is staring at you and you laughing at same time.
Best joke ever: My love life.
Girls are most talented creature on earth. Because they listen half, understand quarter but explain it double.
I told myself I wouldn't give one dash today... so far so good!
Can you do me a favor? Stand in front of my car. I need to test my breaks.
A quiet man is thinking man. A quite woman is usually mad.
'So if you still have appetite of digesting more humor than happily visit Funny Quotes here.'
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